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  Holy Cannoli

Farce by John D Smitherman

62 pages

4 m, 3 w


What do you do to prepare for a visit from your parents? Plenty, when you're the daughter of strict Italian Catholic parents who expect to meet your female roommate, who is actually a guy. John was hoping to celebrate his and Maria's two-year anniversary as housemates by proposing to her. Instead he finds himself as "Suzanne" wearing a dress and trying to cope with Maria's cranky father, her overbearing mother and her wild younger sister. Then there's Maria's old childhood friend who tries to make his move on Maria as well as "Suzanne." Add John's trouble-mak...

  Occupation: Murder!

Audience Participation by Billy St. John

55 pages

6 m, 9 w


Who would suspect that before the live telecast is over for the TV quiz show "It's a Living!" the hardest problem to solve would be, "Who killed Tony Fabrizi, the show's sponsor?" And why was he murdered? Was it for the now missing diamond bracelet he had brought for the commercial, or was he shot for personal reasons? Homicide detective Lt. Jim Slate, along with Amanda Maxwell, a little old lady amateur sleuth, discover that most of the TV show's cast had motives to murder the man - including his Italian wife with a fiery temper. Rounds of the fictional game...

  The Fat of the Land

Comedy by Pat Cook

61 pages

3 m, 7 w


All the ladies at the Thelma Underwood Health Resort are either trying to date Duncan, the new counselor, or plotting how to get rid of Mr. Loggins, a sinister investor with visions of turning the place into a parking lot. Well, most of the ladies are plotting. Francis is busy mugging the cab driver for his Baby Ruth. And just when Duncan makes a play for the secretary, a newspaper reporter shows up to blow the lid off the place. Ulterior motives, hidden secrets and outrageous situations boil up in this all-too-human comedy about what some people will do to l...

  Altar Egos

Comedy by Pat Cook

65 pages

8 m, 9 w, doubling possible


"All we want is a simple wedding," agree Mark and Colleen as they get engaged. And their simple wedding stays simple, for about two minutes. Then the families get involved. There's the McMasters, who think the Frobishers are a bunch of snooty dudes, and the Frobishers, who picture the McMasters as a crowd of hillbillies. The bride's father keeps offering the soon-to-be-wed couple thousands of dollars to elope, "No questions asked!" The bride's mother decides to call in her sister, who is a sweet, lovely woman, until she becomes "The Coordinator, " a drill ser...

  It’s My Wedding, Dear Grandpa

Comedy by Michal Jacot

56 pages

5 m, 7 w


Control freak Amber is getting married to easygoing Scott, and she's going nuts trying to organize the perfect wedding. Her goofball siblings Keith and Frankie aren't helping, and her pushy mother won't listen to her. Then Mom comes up with an inspired idea: a double wedding with Amber and Scott, and with crabby Grandpa and his slightly senile girlfriend Bonnie. Keith, entrusted with finding musical entertainment for the wedding, mistakenly hires two exotic dancers (and accidentally proposes to beefy bridesmaid Donna along the way). Amber's frustration mounts...

  A Commedia Christmas Carol

Commedia by Lane Riosley

75 pages

4 m, 4 w


In this faithful adaptation of the Charles Dickens classic, a traveling troupe of commedia dell'Arte players re-create the Victorian world of “A Christmas Carol” on a bare stage. All of the many wonderful characters are portrayed by these 8 players with cleverness, skill, and comedy. Dickens, an actor, playwright, and enthusiastic theatergoer himself, used many theatrical characters in his novels, especially characters from the commedia dell'Arte tradition. The most notable of these is Ebenezer Scrooge, who is played in this adaptation by commedia's cranky bu...

  A Christmas Carol (Swartz-Play)

Classic by L. Don Swartz

54 pages

11 m, 11 w, 2 flexible, 8 boys, 6 girls.


This faithful yet unique adaptation of the Charles Dickens' holiday story begins in "another world" where Tiny Tim appears. More than just an employee's crippled son, he is a symbol of Scrooge's own infirmity. Scrooge's deceased business partner, Marley, is granted permission to return to Earth with a small but powerful army of holiday spirits on his adventure to convert the covetous old sinner into a Yuletide saint. The most popular scenes of the novel are dramatized, but especially powerful is the future scene of Bob Cratchit's gut-wrenching loss of his bel...

  A Little Christmas Spirit

Christmas Holiday Play by Pat Cook

55 pages

4 m, 5 w, 2 girls


J. D. Morse has been looking high and low for a special Christmas gift for his grandson. Finally, as a last resort, he wanders into Nick's Emporium, an old-fashioned store chock full of all sorts of gifts and knickknacks. He has a hard time explaining to Nick what he's looking for, but finds himself falling under the old storekeeper's spell. Just when Morse is about to buy something, he runs to the street to chase kids away from his car. When he returns, he finds the store suddenly dark and quiet. A policeman then shows up to run him off because, "This place ...

  Nosferatu: Legend of Dracula

Horror by L. Don Swartz

76 pages

21 characters. 6 to 8 men, 8 to 10 women,


No modern-day monster can equal the chill factor than that of Dracula and his nosferatu, the undead who must feed on the blood of the living to exist. Their lust, shown only in the darkest hours, haunts even the bravest of us mortal souls. This adaptation of Bram Stoker's 1897 novel is done with a sure and steady hand by frightmesiter L. Don Swartz. We encounter Dracula's horror from his centuries-old castle in Europe, to the ship he travels on, and finally to his new feeding grounds near an English asylum. When Dracula causes the death of a young woman named...

  Last Chance Inn, Calamity Gulch

Melodrama by Whitney Ryan Garrity

60 pages

4 m , 10 w


Ma and Pa Culpepper are in danger of losing their livelihood - the Last Chance Inn - to Horace Prickley, a representative from the loan offices of Gimme, Gimme & Gimme. In need of a son or son-in-law, the Culpeppers scheme to adopt and marry off pretty (but clumsy) orphan-turned-waitress, Patience Sweetwater. The intended groom is the newly-appointed Sheriff Virgil St. Vigil, who makes the rounds with his deputy and trusted side-kick, Princess Prettyfoot. Prickley learns of the Culpeppers' plot and enlists the aid of the beautiful Sahara Hartburn to "dist...

  Mystery of the Scavenger Hunt Heist

Interactive Mystery by Brian Sylvia

46 pages

4 m, 6 w - 1 optional


Detective Vic Torious is called to the ranch of Bill Yonnaire, the host of the Third Annual Super Spectacular Scavenger Hunt. This year’s event is to be televised for the first time. But the ultimate prize, a solid gold 12-inch laughing hyena worth a million dollars, has disappeared before it is officially “hidden.” Who stole the high-priced hyena? Could it be Duane Pypes, the former teen idol from an ’80s sitcom? Or perhaps it’s the newly-crowned champion of the American Superstar TV series, Carrie Oakey. Add in a retired supermodel, a ruthless defending cha...

  A Christmas Carol (Sodaro-Play)

Classic by Craig Sodaro

41 pages

Flexible cast up to 42


Here's an hour-long adaptation of the Charles Dickens' novel that's as practical as it is entertaining. While staying close to the original novel in dialogue, this version adds additional speaking roles. Along with the hard-hearted Scrooge, the Christmas Spirits, the Cratchit family and the beloved Tiny Tim, there are carolers, goblins, and guests as well as two storytellers, Mrs. Candlewick and Mrs. Peartree, who help keep the action flowing. Because the cast is so flexible, you can combine roles for a small cast or expand it into an all-grade performance. C...

  Charles Dickens's A Christmas Carol

Christmas Drama Holiday by Kevin P. Kern

53 pages

11 m, 10 w, 3 boys, and 12 flexible (With doubling, 4 m, 3 w, 1 boy, 6 flexible)


Ebenezer Scrooge is a cold-hearted miser, choosing to spend Christmas Eve alone instead of with his cheerful nephew, Fred. That night, he is visited by his old colleague, Jacob Marley, who explains that three ghosts will come. After seeing his Christmas Past, Present, and Future, Scrooge awakens with renewed faith. In his redemption, he embraces family and friends and gives generously, forever changed. Following the story of Charles Dickens’s "A Christmas Carol," this unique version incorporates singing narrators, traditional carols, and continuous action on ...

  The Family Fruitcake

Christmas Comedy by Rebecca Frohling

62 pages

4 m, 5 w, 11 youth (approx. 5 boys, 6 girls)


Laurie McKinnon is determined that everyone should have a normal Christmas, especially while the eldest son is away serving in the military. She rushes about making sure everything is ready for the impending arrival of the extended family, although her husband, Jim, and teenage daughter, Kelsey, are unconvinced of the need to impress everyone. Meanwhile, youngest daughter Emma arrives downstairs in full camouflage makeup. Her mother is less than enthused. Visitors soon trickle in. Laurie’s very pregnant sister with her husband, who gets lost easily; Jim’s bro...

  Luau for King Lear

Comedy by Pat Cook

72 pages

3 m, 9 w


The Peaceful Glen Memorial Players are about to mount a new production, but this time, it's a fight for their lives. It's not just the usual hand-to-hand combat between board members Duncan and Hope for the last donut. This time the company is about to lose their building. According to the late Archibald Donnelly's will, they could keep the building as long as they do "quality productions." Oh, they have tried, in their own left-field way, to do the classics. "Isn't it true," family heir Blair Beesley asks, "that you did 'Twelve Angry Men' with five actors an...

  Dinner in Oz

Dinner Theatre by Kandie St.Germain-Kelley

43 pages

7 m, 7 w, 15 flexible


Adapted from the novel, "The Wizard of Oz," by L. Frank Baum.  7 m, 7 w, 15 flexible. Much doubling possible. Extras as munchkins and winged monkeys.  Trapped in Kansas and longing for a mall, Dorothy and Toto are suddenly whirled off stage, right into the audience, where a yellow brick road weaves in and out of the tables and munchkins are serving food. In this outrageous version of L. Frank Baum's lovable book, the Tin Man has frozen in front of a computer, and the Cowardly Lion stands on a guest's chair to escape a mouse. As the plot unfolds, we eventually...

  Dastardly Deeds at Yoursin Mine -or- Yukon Take It With You

Farce by Squire Fridell

82 pages

Flexible cast from 16 to 50+


This great romantic melodrama of the Yukon Territory has it all! Come visit the world of Lester Lawless, Lotta Pidee, Loooney Yoursin, and many others including miners who can't find stakes, trappers who can't find pelts, and Mounties who can't find anyone as they weave a story of Wild West intrigue. Narrators and Sign Gals help dictate active audience involvement as villains are thwarted, heroes and heroines are blissfully united, enemies become friends, widowed matrons are reunited with lost children, and orphans live happily ever after. In addition to a co...

  Dis-Order in the Court!

Farce by Pat Cook

61 pages

7 m, 6 w, extras as desired


First came Judge Wapner, then Judge Judy. Now comes Judge Clapham. But his court is a little more, shall we say, colorful than most. People come to court to bring announcements of car washes, to hold quilting bees and to drop off their mortgage payments. And what starts out as just another lazy day suddenly changes when shyster lawyer E. Z. Miles has the Judge marry two people madly in love...only to find out that the groom is on trial for embezzlement and the only witness against him is his new bride. "A wife cannot testify against her husband, right, Judge?...

  Deadly Deal

Mystery by Billy St. John

68 pages

4 m, 5 w


Charles Lansing, a staid and humorless millionaire, has been found murdered at his country estate and Lt. Paris is in charge of the investigation. Alibis are re-enacted by the suspects, including the third wife married to Lansing for less than a year; the brooding stepchildren; the deceased's attorney, a woman opposed to his latest marriage and the changes in his will; Madame Arcadia, who predicted his death; and the handyman and his wife, who wish to leave their jobs. Everyone had motive and opportunity. At the end of Act I, Lt. Paris leads the audience in a...

  You Must Meet My Wife

Mystery Thriller by Whitney Ryan Garrity

63 pages

3 m, 4 w


In 1949, mystery writer Cornelia Sherwood’s book, Act of Murder, is adapted to the stage by the Bakersfield Playhouse in California, Cornelia plans a visit, taking her faithful secretary, Eunice Sparks, along. Eunice’s cousin, newlywed Rick Winslow, also resides in Bakersfield, so the ladies stop by to meet Rick’s new bride, the very beautiful and wealthy Tracy Bennett Winslow. They soon discover that Tracy is missing. But when she returns, safe, sound, and in the company of the amiable Father Hennessy, Rick insists Tracy is not really his wife. Corn...

  Murder at the Book Club

Comedy Mystery by Sam Havens

60 pages

5 m, 5 w


This is one club where members’ lives are not an open book! Tonight’s meeting of the Queen Anne Murder Mystery Book Club takes a dark twist when a threatening telephone call sets the group on edge. Suddenly all the lights go out and gentle Nellie is murdered. But who is the killer…and why? Do those eerie masks mounted on the wall or that unusual hanging mobile mean anything special? And then a rock with a message attached is thrown against the house jolting everyone even further. Inspector McAdoo follows the clues but soon another murder takes place. Accusati...

  Night Comes Early

Comedy by Burton Bumgarner

70 pages

3 m, 5 w


The director of the Moon Lake Community Theater, Missy Bailey, has dreamed about directing a production of a 1930s psychological melodrama called “Night Comes Early.” As a teenager she saw a professional production of the play and it had a lasting impact. Now that the opportunity has come, she encounters overwhelming obstacles: cast members who don’t know their lines, who drop out at the last minute, who have psychological issues, and workmen who can’t finish building the set. No one is ready on opening night, but the show must go on, even without enough acto...

  Quirk of Fate

Comedy by Pat Cook

72 pages

7 m, 12 w


How could a box of cornflakes almost start a world war? Writing an ad campaign for Hampton’s Medicated Cornflakes is tough, especially when you have to get paid immediately to not get evicted! That’s what faces Rosie, Max, and Sid, who hit upon the idea of quarantining their own office to keep out their demanding landlady. But when a man stumbles in, stabbed in the back, it’s a whole new ballgame. Now, nobody can leave since it’s become the scene of a crime. More police show up along with a legal secretary, a Russian travel agent, a handsome doctor, and worst...

  Aprons

Farce by Gary Ray Stapp

75 pages

4 m, 5 w


The mistress of a Long Island estate is very rich, completely eccentric, and suspiciously homicidal, and yet she regularly gets lost in her own home. So how has she managed to get away with murder? Lady Di has accomplices of course! Four of them to be exact: Adeline, Lydia, Angel, and Felicity, each uniformed in a white apron, armed with a feather duster, and humorously dangerous as they have chosen to protect their employer from the police in order to perpetuate their very generous incomes. But when the body count takes a sudden jump, the camaraderie of the ...

  Blame It on the Pony Express

Melodrama by Whitney Ryan Garrity

51 pages

5 m, 5 w


Gideon Culpepper opens the Last Chance Inn and the guests pour in immediately! Dashing Horace Prickley agrees to help poor flower-peddler Flossie McDurdle become a lady, so she can win her heart’s true love, the spineless but wealthy Theodore Vanderthistle. Teddy’s scheming mother, Vedalia, has other plans though. She sends for Posey Lee Perriwinkle, a beautiful Southern belle who arrives via Pony Express as a mail-order bride. Unfortunately, Posey falls for Gideon instead. Meanwhile Horace finds that he is falling for Flossie and facing the dilemma of helpin...

  The Lottie & Bernice Show

Comedy by L. Don Swartz

58 pages

4 m, 3 w, extras


Two old grumpy Polish ladies, Lottie and Bernice, become trapped in a television studio by a blizzard and end up taking over Western New York’s favorite morning show “Buffalo Yak.” Well, they do have some help. Two constantly bickering janitors, Hal and Sal, agree to handle the editorials while Candy Bickel, a wildly ambitious station intern who sees the blizzard as her break into media stardom, takes over the news desk. Neurotic program director Virgil Mooch tries to help, despite the fact that being on-camera makes him throw up. Lloyd Block, the station man...

  Exposé: Holiday Celebrities Tell All!

Comedy Holiday by Bryan Starchman

41 pages

13 m, 11 w, 4 flexible, extras, much doubling possible


Every month many look to their calendars and start counting down the days until the next holiday. But what about those who are working behind the scenes to make these holidays great? What about the everyday problems of Cupid, leprechauns, and the New Year's Baby? Do we ever stop to think about their needs? Their wants? No! And that's why they're on strike. Journey through the bizarre, strange, and riotously funny underbelly of the holiday world as the icons we all know and love go on strike in this comedy. See what happens when hunters try to shoot down Rudol...

  Just a Little Crazy

Comedy by Renee Rebman

63 pages

2 m, 4 w


Nola goes back to her parents' home after a disagreement with her boyfriend, Quincy, to sort through her problems in peace and quiet. What she finds instead is a circus of confusion. Her mother is dealing with repairs and redecoration of the house; her father refuses to help and escapes to work; and an energetic neighbor helps watch over Aunt Maggie, their somewhat vague relative who recently moved in after possibly poisoning her own cat ... and her late husband. Between the hidden money that turns up missing and Qunicy's arrival and bout with food (?) poison...

  Acting Rich

Farce by Robert Frankel

63 pages

6 m, 7 w


See the butler and maid help the Cummings pack. See the butler and maid escort the Cummings out the door. See the butler and maid turn to each other and embrace because they are actually two aspiring actors, Billy and Wendy, who now have the Cummings estate to themselves! One week of acting rich! Unfortunately for them, they won't be alone and they aren't the only ones acting. For all kinds of weird and hilarious reasons, the neighbor is posing as a cleaning lady; the Cummings' daughter is acting like a family friend; the jewel thief is acting like a long-los...

  Of Moss and Men

Comedy Mystery by David Meyer

74 pages

5 m, 5 w, 5 flexible (doubling possible)


Mr. and Mrs. Moss are the proud new owners of an old abandoned inn which they immediately want to restore and turn into a nightclub. Unfortunately, they're so busy overseeing suspiciously inept repairmen that they pay little attention to the local legend that tells of a treasure hidden somewhere on the estate. So when a severe storm develops forcing an unusual assortment of guests to stay the night along with the questionable workers, it doesn't take a genius to guess a murder will take place. With no help available, the hapless hosts take it upon themselves ...