Melodramas and Westerns

50 pages

Cast: 6 m, 3 w

Hard times have come on Gumption Gulch and Grandma Gertie Parker is forced to open a clothes-washing service to earn extra money. Even Sheriff Gideon Gumption is “moonlighting” (though the term has him totally baffled) at the stagecoach office and a local lunch spot. Grandma Gertie’s old nemesis has sent her two boys, Luther and Ulysses Bragg, to town to put Gertie’s laundry service out of business as payback for an old feud. Add in a possum-farming brother and sister couple (Elrod has a serious case of “the anxieties”), a blacksmith who dreams of being a com...

82 pages

Flexible cast from 16 to 50+

This great romantic melodrama of the Yukon Territory has it all! Come visit the world of Lester Lawless, Lotta Pidee, Loooney Yoursin, and many others including miners who can't find stakes, trappers who can't find pelts, and Mounties who can't find anyone as they weave a story of Wild West intrigue. Narrators and Sign Gals help dictate active audience involvement as villains are thwarted, heroes and heroines are blissfully united, enemies become friends, widowed matrons are reunited with lost children, and orphans live happily ever after. In addition to a colorful cast, the stage crew, G...

28 pages

4 m, 5 w, 1 flexible

An evil banker, Char Cole, wants the land the church sits on to build a casino. He sends a bogus mortgage bill demanding the church pay a $10,000 balloon payment to scare the congregation in to selling him the property for a fraction of what it is worth. Church members hurriedly decides to submit a secret barbecue recipe to a contest in hopes of winning the huge cash prize. They even open a barbecue restaurant in the church to raise money. Meanwhile, Miss Phit, the bumbling church secretary, is constantly getting the bulletins and newsletters wrong, sending misleading and funny informat...

71 pages

7 m, 7 w, and extras (doubling possible)

Here's a hilarious melodrama spoof whose oddball characters seemingly ad lib their way through the wildest plot ever to come down the pike. Lovely, innocent Constance Purdy is about to lose her home to that villain-about-town, Wiley Schlink. Will hero Monroe Mannerly ride to the rescue in time? Will her long-lost prospector father show up and save the day? These questions aren't really answered because we're laughing too hard at the sheriff who has a mortgage on her own jail, a medicine man who ends up in a dress, and a saloon-smashing suffragette whose ax wo...

60 pages

4 m , 10 w

Ma and Pa Culpepper are in danger of losing their livelihood - the Last Chance Inn - to Horace Prickley, a representative from the loan offices of Gimme, Gimme & Gimme. In need of a son or son-in-law, the Culpeppers scheme to adopt and marry off pretty (but clumsy) orphan-turned-waitress, Patience Sweetwater. The intended groom is the newly-appointed Sheriff Virgil St. Vigil, who makes the rounds with his deputy and trusted side-kick, Princess Prettyfoot. Prickley learns of the Culpeppers' plot and enlists the aid of the beautiful Sahara Hartburn to "distract" the Sheriff from Patience. ...

24 pages

12 actors (3 m, 3 w, 6 flexible)

Tomorrow is opening night at The Grand Old Theatre and Mastermime, a notorious criminal who distracts audiences with entrancing mime routines and then disappears with their valuables, has defaced the theatre marquee and is terrorizing the stagehands. Will hard-boiled detective Stanton Ovation and his earnest sidekick Deputy Hammet Upp capture this mute but expressive villain before he steals self-absorbed celebrity actress Ima Starr’s diamonds? Or is there more to this case than it seems? Ima’s talkative assistant Roberta, who was a forensic scientist before entering the glamorous world of ...

40 pages

5 m, 6 w, 8 flexible, 6 children

It is business as usual at the Mega-Bite Candy Company. Pop Tart is stirring the chocolate, Stretch is headed for the Taffy Room, Cookie the Clown is preparing to host a tour of young school children, Jan and Dean are experimenting with new flavors of candy, and--most significantly--Graham Cracker is looking for Kandy Kane. As Graham searches for Miss Kane and attempts to propose, Grimsley Krumkake, a dastardly villain posing as a vat inspector, enters with his dopey sidekick, Bink. Thus is set in motion a fiendish plan to take over the world, beginning with the Mega-Bite Candy Company. ...

58 pages

3 m, 6 w, 3 flexible parts

The Culpeppers open the doors to the Last Chance Inn once again in this hilarious sequel to "Last Chance Inn, Calamity Gulch." Ma's just as harried, Pa's just as cantankerous, and Horace Prickley is just as villainous! This time he plots to woo and wed the woeful Widder Black and take control of her fortune. It seems, however, that Horace may have to share the money with the Widder's noble nephew, Peter Loveless...if the young man finds a bride before the week is out. Enter two likely prospects - Pansy Perriwinkle (the most annoyingly sweet heroine ever to grace a melodrama stage!) and ...

83 pages

9 m, 14 w, 3 flexible, some doubling possible.

Luke needs to come up with money to pay the mortgage on the family ranch, and fast. His three friends offer to help him open up a dude ranch, and he knows he has no choice but to accept their generosity. At first, Luke is a little leery over the whole plan, but how hard can it be to teach a few city folk about life on a ranch? But things start to go wrong when his quirky guests arrive. There’s Aspen and Ariel, two hillbilly sisters who can’t keep their hands off of Luke’s friends Nash and Nolan. Next to arrive are Martha, Mercy, and Grace, who want a final ou...

36 pages

8 m, 7 w, flexible extras

It's the late 1890s, and the little town of Astaire, Wyoming, ready to enter the new century as the "Paris of the Plains," has just elected the first female sheriff west of the Mississippi! Daisy Dandelion vows to bring about law and order with just a law book and "good ol' female common sense." The mayor, who's always looking at the “big picture," and his town council are holding a hoedown in honor of Daisy, who loves to dance. But this celebration is tap-dancing with trouble! One young woman, in a burst of defiance against husbands ruling the roost, encourages the ladies to march around...

55 pages

2 m, 9 w, 10 flex. Possible extras and doubling.

It’s the year 1890 in Saddlesore City. The Carson Hotel is a fun place to hang your hat and jist have a good ole time with friends and neighbors - playin' cards, dancin', laughin',singin', gossipin' and…drinkin' sassafras root beer by the gallons! Well, that's the way it used to be when Charles was alive but now it's just a sorry-eyed, sad-faced, ghost of a place where even the spiders are bored out of their minds! Widow Henrietta has become overwhelmed with both the duties of hotelin' and tryin' to raise Liza and Skeeter. Her once happy attitude has now turn...

42 pages

6 m, 5 w, extras, doubling possible

Papa Praiseworthy has mortgaged the family farm to have money to pay for the long-needed operation to cure Mama and create a trousseau for sweet Polly’s marriage to our hero, Jedediah Justice, of Justice Junction. Little does the family know when they stop to help an ill traveler on the road, the man is the evil brother of the villain, Delvin Dastardly. The Dastardly brothers frame Papa and get him thrown onto a chain gang. Now Polly will have to bring in the harvest with only the aid of her brother Penrose and sister Penny. Too proud to do less, Polly woefully turns Jedediah away, breaki...

43 pages

5 m, 6 w, 3 flexible parts

Villainous Bernard Blackburn is in debt up to his dark moustache, but he plans to wed innocent Polly Goodson to remedy that! She believes she is penniless, but actually her late father's insurance policy is very valuable. Blackburn is somewhat daunted when he meets Polly's eccentric family and disapproving maid, but he easily gets her boyfriend, John Trueheart, out of the picture by convincing him to go off to make his fortune before asking Polly for her hand in marriage. Luckily, Trueheart finds his fortune in a diamond mine and in a final blackout scene, everyone gets their just reward...

64 pages

8 m, 6 w

What happens when two villains in a melodrama meet? The action begins when an English Vicar returns home from doing missionary work in America. Unbeknownst to him, he has brought back a map to a thriving gold mine in California. The Vicar is followed across the pond by the villainous Bart Lovelace and his accomplices who are trying to find the map. Meanwhile, an English villain, Agamore Primrose, has been courting one of the Vicar’s lovely daughters in hopes of gaining a small but handsome inheritance should the Vicar succumb to an untimely accident. During their adventures, the two vi...

47 pages

4 m, 5 w, 4 flexible

Flint Buckshot is away at a sheriffs convention, so his daughter, Shania, is the deputy in charge - even though she never did get a horse, badge, or a gun to make it official-like! When two desperados, Saddleback Bertha and Sleazebag Barney, roll into town, they realize they've found easy pickings. Telegrams soon arrive reporting that Flint's been badly hurt. Smelling an opportunity, Bertha points out that since Shania is a novice, Barney should be the sheriff because he has considerable experience with law enforcement (although on the wrong side of the law!) Suddenly a masked gunman ap...