Community Theatre Full Length

72 pages

7 m, 12 w

How could a box of cornflakes almost start a world war? Writing an ad campaign for Hampton’s Medicated Cornflakes is tough, especially when you have to get paid immediately to not get evicted! That’s what faces Rosie, Max, and Sid, who hit upon the idea of quarantining their own office to keep out their demanding landlady. But when a man stumbles in, stabbed in the back, it’s a whole new ballgame. Now, nobody can leave since it’s become the scene of a crime. More police show up along with a legal secretary, a Russian travel agent, a handsome doctor, and worst...

75 pages

4 m, 5 w

The mistress of a Long Island estate is very rich, completely eccentric, and suspiciously homicidal, and yet she regularly gets lost in her own home. So how has she managed to get away with murder? Lady Di has accomplices of course! Four of them to be exact: Adeline, Lydia, Angel, and Felicity, each uniformed in a white apron, armed with a feather duster, and humorously dangerous as they have chosen to protect their employer from the police in order to perpetuate their very generous incomes. But when the body count takes a sudden jump, the camaraderie of the ...

58 pages

4 m, 3 w, extras

Two old grumpy Polish ladies, Lottie and Bernice, become trapped in a television studio by a blizzard and end up taking over Western New York’s favorite morning show “Buffalo Yak.” Well, they do have some help. Two constantly bickering janitors, Hal and Sal, agree to handle the editorials while Candy Bickel, a wildly ambitious station intern who sees the blizzard as her break into media stardom, takes over the news desk. Neurotic program director Virgil Mooch tries to help, despite the fact that being on-camera makes him throw up. Lloyd Block, the station man...

63 pages

2 m, 4 w

Nola goes back to her parents' home after a disagreement with her boyfriend, Quincy, to sort through her problems in peace and quiet. What she finds instead is a circus of confusion. Her mother is dealing with repairs and redecoration of the house; her father refuses to help and escapes to work; and an energetic neighbor helps watch over Aunt Maggie, their somewhat vague relative who recently moved in after possibly poisoning her own cat ... and her late husband. Between the hidden money that turns up missing and Qunicy's arrival and bout with food (?) poison...

63 pages

6 m, 7 w

See the butler and maid help the Cummings pack. See the butler and maid escort the Cummings out the door. See the butler and maid turn to each other and embrace because they are actually two aspiring actors, Billy and Wendy, who now have the Cummings estate to themselves! One week of acting rich! Unfortunately for them, they won't be alone and they aren't the only ones acting. For all kinds of weird and hilarious reasons, the neighbor is posing as a cleaning lady; the Cummings' daughter is acting like a family friend; the jewel thief is acting like a long-los...

74 pages

5 m, 5 w, 5 flexible (doubling possible)

Mr. and Mrs. Moss are the proud new owners of an old abandoned inn which they immediately want to restore and turn into a nightclub. Unfortunately, they're so busy overseeing suspiciously inept repairmen that they pay little attention to the local legend that tells of a treasure hidden somewhere on the estate. So when a severe storm develops forcing an unusual assortment of guests to stay the night along with the questionable workers, it doesn't take a genius to guess a murder will take place. With no help available, the hapless hosts take it upon themselves ...

74 pages

6 m, 8 w

Purdy, who runs her Showtime Café famous for such dishes as “Fistful of Dollar Pancakes” and “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Ham,” is getting ready for a food critic, hoping for a great write-up. But that’s the least of her worries when she learns her old boyfriend is back in town. She and Austin made a pledge that if they weren’t hooked up with anyone else in twenty-five years they’d get together. Amelia and Celia, two gossips, have it all over town in no time! Jeanie, the teen who works for Purdy, thinks it’s so romantic and soon she and Cody Barnes get engaged! ...

59 pages

3 m, 5 w

Lord and Lady Lexington have picked a rather beastly night to throw a haunted house party in their newly acquired home, Foxworth Manor. Oddly, the guest list appears to be made up of disparate and desperate strangers. There's the pretty secretary, the acerbic gossip columnist, the local physician, the flighty real-estate agent and a handsome, but somewhat surly young man. Foxworth Manor has a tragic history, and this evening will prove to be no exception. As the storm rages on outside, the guests suddenly discover that not everyone is quite the stranger they ...

69 pages

6 m, 5 w

Two young innkeepers, Alex and Rolly, are struggling to make a success of a once-elegant hostelry in the Hamptons, but it's tough, especially with the owner Lucinda Pickle breathing down their necks. Of course it doesn't help that the hotel's permanent resident, Mrs. Prescott, collects pet mice; that the hotel chef, Cookie, is given to bursting into tears and resigning; and that a petty criminal, Willis the pickpocket, is looking for a place to hide out. When Hollywood horror movie producer Julian K. Silverblatt checks in with his vain bodyguard and his sneez...

65 pages

5 m, 5 w, 7 flexible

Ernestine Webb is overwhelmed by the day-to-day pressures of managing the $77 million Webb fortune. When her slightly senile friend, Miss Pomfrey, visits bemoaning the loss of her beloved gerbil, and the heirs think it's Mother Webb who has died, Ernestine realizes that death is one way to get out from under all the hassles. She cooks up an elaborate plot to fake her demise. To see how much they've inherited, her greedy children fall all over each other in an attempt to find their mother's will and when they can't find it, they simply make up their own. Wild ...

69 pages

4 m, 7 w

It's business as usual for Wilson and Associates, a suspiciously funny firm consisting of three flat-broke lady con-artists. They'll do practically anything to meet the rent, from reading horoscopes over the phone to renting themselves out as graveside mourners. One client, a dithering old lady, absent-mindedly drops the tidbit that she has just held up the local bank and the action springboards from there. The girls find themselves in a web of arson, counterfeiting and robbery and then, their worst fears are confirmed, the Better Business Bureau shows up! On...

84 pages

5 m, 6 w, 1 boy, 1 girl, 4 extra children, doubling possible.

Champion marigold horticulturist, neighborhood snoop, and generally nasty human being Leona Crump is back! Nine years earlier, she was tricked into selling her home and nearly ousted from her neighborhood as the result of an elaborate charade instigated by her friends and foes. But now, finally, her old house is on the market, and Leona is determined to move back home. Unfortunately, the real estate agent has been instructed to never sell the house back to Leona. Reluctantly, Leona partners with her estranged sister Francine (who has her own agenda), and the ...

49 pages

5 m, 3 w, 1 or 2 flexible

What do you get when you put a married couple, a butler, an evil owner of an estate, a local spiritualist, and five ghosts in a mansion overnight? Kenny and Janelle are a determined couple, willing to spend the night in the haunted Gottlieb Mansion to become the new owners. Consuela Gottlieb has other plans, while the ghosts are just trying to get the key to their spirit home. With a group hug at the end, this witty comedy is sure to keep the audience laughing. About 75 minutes. Great show for Halloween or any time of the year.

51 pages

2 m, 3 w

After years of waiting for a traditional marriage proposal, Caroline's had it. When she takes matters into her own hands and plans a "surprise" wedding at her family's vacation home, side-splitting mayhem is set in motion. This wedding, hardly the dream variety, has all the same trappings as a surprise birthday party: secrets, shrewd planning, and timing gone awry. Grudgingly participating in the scheme is her practical best friend and maid of honor, Beth. She questions everything from her bridesmaid dress (which she refers to as a fuchsia tortilla) to the ju...

69 pages

with doubling, 7 m, 7 w

Leo Mintz, a one-time big shot Broadway agent, now represents bird acts, roller-skating kids who recite poetry and flea circuses. However, Leo's problems are just starting when a known gangster Louie DeMarco "persuades" Leo to represent his protege with no discernible talent, the lovely Christine. As if this weren't bad enough, Leo promptly falls in love with her. "They should just type up a label which reads 'East River' and slap it on our foreheads!" scowls Liz, the secretary and bouncer for Leo's agency. Then, to throw everyone off the track, Leo stages a ...