Melodramas and Westerns

47 pages

4 m, 5 w, 4 flexible

Flint Buckshot is away at a sheriffs convention, so his daughter, Shania, is the deputy in charge - even though she never did get a horse, badge, or a gun to make it official-like! When two desperados, Saddleback Bertha and Sleazebag Barney, roll into town, they realize they've found easy pickings. Telegrams soon arrive reporting that Flint's been badly hurt. Smelling an opportunity, Bertha points out that since Shania is a novice, Barney should be the sheriff because he has considerable experience with law enforcement (although on the wrong side of the law!)...

28 pages

4 m, 4 w

In order to save his darling Lily Lackamoney from the clutches of the rapscallion J. Tamarack Gargle, the hero, Balderdash Trustworthy, goes to the city to find the necessary money. Gargle, determined to have the fair damsel, employs the dirty work of Maxine Mascara to throw Balderdash into the river. However, just as the preacher is pronouncing Lily and Gargle man and wife, Balderdash enters in a blaze of glory! One act.

64 pages

8 m, 6 w

What happens when two villains in a melodrama meet? The action begins when an English Vicar returns home from doing missionary work in America. Unbeknownst to him, he has brought back a map to a thriving gold mine in California. The Vicar is followed across the pond by the villainous Bart Lovelace and his accomplices who are trying to find the map. Meanwhile, an English villain, Agamore Primrose, has been courting one of the Vicar’s lovely daughters in hopes of gaining a small but handsome inheritance should the Vicar succumb to an untimely accident. During t...

48 pages

3 m, 6 w

Aurelia Archibald, a Southern widow, and her four daughters are all that remain on Archibald Plantation when it is taken over by Union forces. Expecting Northerners to be heartless brutes, they are confounded when the Yankees treat them courteously. The villain of the piece – actually a villainess – is the beautiful but treacherous Gardenia Galsworthy. She is determined to save her plantation from destruction by revealing to the Yankees where the Archibalds have hidden their jewels. Little does she realize they are also hiding Beauregard Burnside, a Confedera...

63 pages

5 m, 4 w, 3 extras

1920s Hollywood is the setting of this melodrama. Sneakypete Underhand, a villainous doctor, and his henchwoman, nurse Heide Bedpann, are hired to work at a silent movie studio, where Sneakypete quickly hatches a plot to kidnap a top star, Verily Speakwell. Little do they know that when talking pictures arrive, the actress has such a horrible voice her career will be doomed! Sneakypete ends up disguised as a harem dancer to fool the director, Alfred Hitchkick, and the co-stars, including Manly Jawline, a dim movie hero, and Peerless Sneer, the ham actor who p...

55 pages

2 m, 9 w, 10 flex. Possible extras and doubling.

It’s the year 1890 in Saddlesore City. The Carson Hotel is a fun place to hang your hat and jist have a good ole time with friends and neighbors - playin' cards, dancin', laughin',singin', gossipin' and…drinkin' sassafras root beer by the gallons! Well, that's the way it used to be when Charles was alive but now it's just a sorry-eyed, sad-faced, ghost of a place where even the spiders are bored out of their minds! Widow Henrietta has become overwhelmed with both the duties of hotelin' and tryin' to raise Liza and Skeeter. Her once happy attitude has now turn...

36 pages

4 m, 6 w

Melodrama meets the high seas when J. P. Morganfeller, mysterious millionaire, carries his priceless painting, the "Mona Lisa Unbuttoned," aboard ship. A villainous art thief and three lady cat burglars (thinly disguised as high society types) steal it and throw all the blame on officer Vance Trueblue, who must solve the case to keep his sterling reputation and his true love, Dimity Darling. About 40 minutes.

36 pages

8 m, 7 w, flexible extras

It's the late 1890s, and the little town of Astaire, Wyoming, ready to enter the new century as the "Paris of the Plains," has just elected the first female sheriff west of the Mississippi! Daisy Dandelion vows to bring about law and order with just a law book and "good ol' female common sense." The mayor, who's always looking at the “big picture," and his town council are holding a hoedown in honor of Daisy, who loves to dance. But this celebration is tap-dancing with trouble! One young woman, in a burst of defiance against husbands ruling the roost, encoura...

69 pages

4 m, 6 w

Even though lovely young Julia works hard, she and her aunt will not be able to afford to keep their humble home, which sits at the edge of a garbage dump. If they lose their home, they’ll also lose the treasure Julia’s papa buried somewhere on the property that would take care of all their needs. (Hero Dan would ask his parents for money to help Julia, but alas, he too is an orphan.) As they try yet again to figure out the special riddle to the treasure’s location, a German Mennonite detective appears on the case and is soon followed by two old ladies with l...

71 pages

7 m, 7 w, and extras (doubling possible)

Here's a hilarious melodrama spoof whose oddball characters seemingly ad lib their way through the wildest plot ever to come down the pike. Lovely, innocent Constance Purdy is about to lose her home to that villain-about-town, Wiley Schlink. Will hero Monroe Mannerly ride to the rescue in time? Will her long-lost prospector father show up and save the day? These questions aren't really answered because we're laughing too hard at the sheriff who has a mortgage on her own jail, a medicine man who ends up in a dress, and a saloon-smashing suffragette whose ax wo...

22 pages

Flexible cast of 14

Smedley S. Snerd, a typical nerd hero, is the star student of Miss Fossil's geology class. He's got a big crush on Marybelle Moosenheimer, the heroine, star cheerleader, and member of the Locks, a group which values their beautiful hair. Other peer groups include the Rocks, who are into "heavy metal"; the Jocks, who are athletically inclined; and the Rolls, a gang of hoodlums led by the infamous macho villain, Mr. G. But brain outwits brawn as Smedley uses his marbles to trip up Mr. G and his gang, win Marybelle's hand, and explain to Miss Fossil the real ori...

58 pages

3 m, 6 w, 3 flexible parts

The Culpeppers open the doors to the Last Chance Inn once again in this hilarious sequel to "Last Chance Inn, Calamity Gulch." Ma's just as harried, Pa's just as cantankerous, and Horace Prickley is just as villainous! This time he plots to woo and wed the woeful Widder Black and take control of her fortune. It seems, however, that Horace may have to share the money with the Widder's noble nephew, Peter Loveless...if the young man finds a bride before the week is out. Enter two likely prospects - Pansy Perriwinkle (the most annoyingly sweet heroine ever to gr...

36 pages

4 m, 4 w

Duke Deadheader, the most rotten rascal on the railroad, plots to relieve the simple but honest stationmaster, Ralph Roundhouse, of the company's construction funds. Aided by his beautiful, but nasty, accomplice, Flora Flagstop, he burns down the lumber mill of our hero, Stanley Studmill, cons Ralph into signing a worthless contract for ties (Ralph thought they were railroad ties), and kidnaps our heroine Rebecca Roundhouse. All appears lost, but Duke has not reckoned with the mysterious Chinese foreman, Gan Dee, nor the ever-reliable Boxcar Betsy and her cou...

33 pages

3 m, 7 w

Here's sparkling mellerdrammer that has more plot twists than a pretzel factory. The setting is a near-bankrupt photo studio in the Territory of Arizona, owned by Mrs. Paula Roid, a widow who divides her time between her sickbed and her lovely daughter, Aster, "the dainty darling of the darkroom." But several other Arizonians have their beady eyes on Miss Roid, including the dastardly Mayor Gobblecrud, who is also their landlord. Just when the situation is about to explode, a stagecoach arrives with several interesting characters, including Jacques-Louis Dagu...

42 pages

7 m, 9 w

Unlike most villains, who only have to fight a hero in trying to win the lovely lady, Egar Duntley has to face Miss Lil's whole boardinghouse full of zany characters. There are Miss Lil's mischievous little brothers who dislike him, the deaf lady who keeps staring at him, the men-hungry spinsters who are chasing him, and others. Even more laughs come from Della, Duntley's cleaning lady accomplice. She is chased by an old boarder and served some "fruit juice" which makes her stiff as a board - a part any comedic actress will love to get her teeth into. The her...