Mustn’t Tell

In a sunny suburban living room, circa 1960, five women gather for tea. Hostess Bettie has sent friends Bonnie, Bunnie, and Bootie out to see her garden – a ploy which allows Bettie to share a juicy tidbit of gossip with the fifth woman, Darla. It seems that the “man-crazy” Bonnie once again disgraced herself at the bridal shower which all five recently attended. Darla listens obediently but is plainly reluctant to be made the keeper of secrets. The others return, and now Bonnie button-holes Darla and relates a similar tidbit concerning the “sweet but dumb” Bunnie. And so it goes, the women singly or in duos and trios compelling the long-suffering Darla to listen to tales of drunken faux pas. The ruses employed to get each other out of the room grow increasingly absurd (yet never fail); the instructions concerning whom Darla “mustn’t tell” grow increasingly elaborate:

“You can tell Bettie what I said about Bonnie, and Bunnie what I said about Bettie, but don’t tell Bonnie about Bunnie or Bettie, unless Bunnie first tells Bonnie about Bettie; and certainly don’t tell Bunnie about Bonnie, or Bettie about Bunnie, promise?”

In the end the “Four Bs” push Darla over the edge, cattily gossiping about her as she sits there aghast. But the unassuming Darla surprises us all with the boldness and precision of her triumphant retort.  “Mustn’t Tell” is a lively farce, full of movement and acrobatic language. It should not for one moment be taken seriously.  Running time: 20 to 25 minutes.